Why is it such a struggle to love myself every day?
This is a great question that was asked Bobbie Hayes- DiDomenico.
I’m going to answer it from my own perspective.
I used to roll my eyes when I saw posts with people saying “love-yourself”.
What the eff does it mean?
It’s not like I go around hating myself, not consciously, right. I knew I was hard on myself, but I didn’t think that was self-hate. I just thought it was normal, the thing that needed to happen.
Then one day David Neagle asked me, “what happened to you?” and I said, “I wasn’t loved.”
And a light bulb went out …
I didn’t feel loved. I thought I was unlovable and I knew in my heart that I didn’t love me. I couldn’t really say it. That night I did a healing to bring my love back into me and I really started to love me.
With all the healing work I’d done, this was the first time, I could finally look in the mirror and say I loved myself.
That was the easy part.
Then the hard work started.
What would I do differently if I truly loved myself? I decided to stop beating on myself. I gave up being a workaholic as an act of self-love. It was like being whipped into submission. Self-love means allowing what wants to come from me to come through.
I say real work because this blew up my identity and who I thought I was. My whole identity was shattered in a whole minute and I spent the next 12-months lost and dazed. It’s what is called the dark of the night soul. It’s the space between the old and the new.
Do I love myself every day?
It’s a practice.
It’s practice for everyone. it’s a dance with our inner being.
When I catch myself (I don’t always), I change.
What it boils down to is the ability to identify where I’m hating on myself (should, have to’s, holding on) and to let go of what I think I should do and just be me.
It’s how I was able to break my diet coke habit last summer and start running. I saw these things as acts of self-love, not obligations to be hard on myself. I kept the running and I must break the diet-coke addiction again.
It’s also I started to expand my vision and receive more. Just-enough was a self-hatred practice. No more. I want more and it’s okay. No more judgement.
It’s a practice.
One day at a time.
Here’s something you can do practice …
- Identify one thing. Where i your life are you hating on yourself? Where are you denying yourself? How are you being hard on yourself?
- Do you want to change it and why? Make a conscious decision. If you don’t do this, you’re not going to change it.
- What would be an act of self-love? This could be drinking more water. This could be making a decision to stop a relationship or to ask for what you really want.
- Go do it.
They say follow your inspiration.
I actively try to do that every single day. I get into a better feeling place and I let myself be inspired. Sometimes I do that with a song, sometimes with a meditation and always with a mindset practice. It’s a key part of my day.
I do believe that my inner being is guiding me to create my dreams in the fastest way possible.
So when I was inspired to attend a two-day workshop, I signed up.
Now I got into the workshop and something immediately felt off for me. It was like jumping on a merry-go-around that was just not going fast enough for my own liking and that kept breaking down.
What I had a been thinking?
I realized this morning that it had been a detour with a very important lesson:
You can’t copy/follow someone else and expect to be massively amazing and successful. The KEY is to make it your own and follow your truth no matter what someone else says. It doesn’t matter how much you like them or how successful they are.
If you’re ready to get into the driver seat of your life and start creating your LIFE on your terms, grab a copy of Kick Start Your Best Life. It’s a 3-part training designed to give the confidence & motivation you need to start taking action on your dreams TODAY. You will also learn how to crush the self-doubt that stops you from following your own truth.
It’s $47, but only until the end of the month. After that, the price goes up to $197.
Have you ever felt like an egg is about to crack open?
Like something inside of you is just waiting to come out, used but all the while you’re feeling trapped. Maybe by your relationships, your job or by your past?
You’re definitely not alone.
Today I wanted to share with you my top 3 TIPS for cracking yourself open and releasing what’s inside of you so you can crack open.
After all, the good stuff inside the egg (aka the good stuff inside of you) can’t come out if you don’t crack it open. YES, I’m comparing you to an EGG. You have so much stuff inside of you and it’s time for it to come.
The reason I want this for you is that I want you to come alive. I want you to experience life and you can’t do this if you’re trapped.
I get it.
Back when I worked in the IT world, I felt like I was trapped and I couldn’t breathe.
One part of me told to suck it up and this was life. The other part of me told to GET out and to RUN like hell.
As much as I wanted too, I was totally paralyzed in fear.
- What if I get it wrong and fall flat on my face?
- What if THIS what life is supposed to be like?
- What if I’m not meant to be happy?
My breakthrough came during a meditation where I finally allowed myself to just be ME.
For a while, I stopped caring about what other people and I started to put me first. Within 18 months, I’d left my “real” corporate job, I’d gone into coaching and started my Theta Healing® journal. I also published my first book.
Here are 3 KEYS to cracking up and letting yourself rise into purpose, passion and happiness:
1) There is no perfect time
For years, I thought that I needed a plan and that I needed to be ready to leave my corporate job. When I left, I was actually in a really good place in my jo. I had a team of 17 people and I loved every minute. I had all the reasons in the world to say, but I just to go. There is no perfect time to go after what you want. There is just right now.
If you never crack an egg, the best parts remain in the inside.
2) Momentum is required.
When I left my “real” corporate job, I didn’t want a boring ‘consulting’ job, but I wanted things to change. And I knew they wouldn’t change if I stayed where I was. If I hadn’t put the energy up front to get past the FEAR, I would still be trapped. What I discovered is that if you want things to change, you have to put some energy into it to get yourself started and to get past the FEAR that keeps you track.
If you never crack the egg, you’ll never RISE.
3) Take radical responsibility
If you want to change your life, it’s up to you. YOU ARE FREE, but you have to take responsibility for your life and what you choose to create.
You can’t change your life if you’re waiting for rainbows and unicorns to come and force you to take make a change.
Only you can crack the egg and rise.
If you’re ready to crack open and rise into purpose passion and happiness, check out Goddess Rising. I’m now accepting applications for the next round, which starts in April.
In case you don’t know, it’s my six-week program to help professional women who feel TRAPPED inside themselves and want to rise into purpose, passion and happiness.
Get it all out here ⇒ http://www.nathalieguerin.com/goddess-rising
Helpful? Hit reply and let me know.
See you soon –
Do you ever tell yourself, “I don’t know what to do?”
Isn’t it the best excuse?
As long as you don’t know what to do, you don’t have to face those fears of yours and do what’s scaring you. The problem, of course, is that it keeps you stuck and feeling miserable. You’ll never find your purpose, have a bigger impact and live up to your potential way.
It’s a little like climbing a rope to get a better view, but when you get to the top, you’re looking with your eyes closed in infinity. It’s exhausting and it gets you nowhere FAST. Eventually, it just zaps your confidence and self-esteem because now you have proof that you don’t know what to do.
Stop closing your eyes, acknowledge what you do know and take the next step.
If you still don’t know what to do, it just means that your ego is on overdrive trying to keep you safe.
If that happens, close your eyes, put your right hand over your heart, connect with God and ask your inner being guidance for guidance. You will be shown the way. Journal it out.
Go take action.
Helpful? Questions? Comments? Let me know in the comments.
Now you won’t necessarily be shown the entire solution, but you will be shown the next steps.
Finding the confidence to trust yourself and take action is a big part of Goddess Rising™ .
If you’re ready to get the confidence to follow your path so you can find your purpose, have a bigger impact AND you want my help, click here to apply for a FREE coaching call here.
I used to be addicted to emotional pain.
I didn’t like the pain one bit, but I did love it.
I sabotaged my business efforts, just so I could have more struggle. I beat myself up every time I didn’t reach my goals or when I had a emotion that was anything less than happy, which was daily. I worked myself into the ground & depression over and over again.
Like anything, I got a lot out of being addicted to suffering.
Pain gave me something to fight, something to prove, something to heal and something to do. If I could fight all the pain in the world, maybe I’d be finally worthy and deserving.
What do you get out of being addicted to pain?
With healing work, I was able to break patterns, but the big breakthrough didn’t happen until about a year ago when I had a spiritual awakening during a healing session and I actually started loving myself.
From that point forward, everything changed. I was no longer willing to accept the pain because I recognized it for what it was; an act of self-hate. I made a very conscious to stop beating myself to a pulp.
You’re not on this earth to fight pain. You’re here to experience joy.
It sent me a into a tail spin.
I mean, who was I without the pain?
But now that I’m on the other side of it, I have to tell you that it’s made room for the real me to emerge and I’m finally being, doing and having the life I’ve always wanted.
Who would you be without the pain?
You’d be free to acknowledge your heart’s desires. you’d tap into your divine guidance. You’d feel inspired to take action. taking inspired action is never hard even when it’s challenging. That’s because it comes from within.
Are you ready to start letting go of the pain?
Yesterday I created a a group healing journey to help you start letting go of the pain. You don’t need the pain to help you float. You have nothing to prove You can have more joy, happiness and inspiration now.
If you’re ready, click the link to get started
Do you ever get super clear about what you want, get started and then get stuck in paralysis?
It’s a little bit like having a harpoon in your hands, freezing in mid-air as you go to get your fish from the ocean.
Know what I mean?
You’re not alone. It’s normal.
It’s your FEAR stopping you from getting what you want. The problem isn’t the fear, the problem is you let the FEAR control you. If you let it control you, it will cause you to self-sabotage and STOP from getting what you want. Eventually you’ll either stop trying or start again and this whole pattern will start all over again.
I freeze all the time.
Earlier today it was about my launch in January (which I’m super pumped about) because I know you’re going to LOVE all the goodies that come with it.
Want to break the pattern?
The first step is to be aware of your pattern. You can’t change it if you’re not aware. For me, I realize that I become frozen I stop getting inspiration and I get stuck in the i don’t know what to do. Anything to stop me from taking the next step. It’s my first sign that I’m trapped in fear.
How does your pattern show up for you? Let me know in the comments.
Once you know the pattern, it’s time to clear it.
As a healer, I like to figure out the root cause of the fear and clear the need for the pattern in the first place. For example, this morning I dug up that this is a pattern that passed down from my ancestors. They had to believe this in order to survive .
Start by getting clear on how this pattern serves you. What are you learning? What do you think your ancestors were learning. What does God want you to learn? What virtues have you learned? This is hard for most people to do.
The tendency is to say it doesn’t serve you or that it just keeps you safe. EVERYTHING keeps you safe. Go deeper.
Are you ready to let it go? Let me know in the comments. If not, what’s holding you back!!!
If not, then keep digging. There’s still something in it for you for you to learn.
When you are ready to let it go, imagine the pattern in your being and release the energy into love and light.
That’s it – pretty simple right.
When I cleared my energy this morning, I stopped being frozen and I started receiving inspiration again. It was like being able to breathe.
Want to know what it is? It’s going to be one of the BEST ways to starts the new year EVER.